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 My Match Experience & my Anxiety  



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Author9 Posts
  #1

Hi,
I want to share my match experience and my anxiety with all of you. I graduated from an average medical school in 2000 where I was a totally average student and pretty much careless type. In late 2000 my whole family migrated to USA and I ended up in America not by choice but by destiny. I had no ambition to become a doctor in America or if I tell the truth, I did not think I was good enough. During my rotations in medical school as a student, I did not find them comprehensive enough to give me confidence to work as a stand alone physician. After spending 4 yrs doing odd jobs (as pharmacy technician), I realized I want more money My financial situation is such that I have to make more money in the coming years and that was the only motivating factor that drove me towards USMLE. This may sound shallow but this is a fact.

. So I started studying for USMLE and passed both steps with scores in mid 80’s first attempt. I had no USCE, no US LOR and no connections but still I matched at a small community hospital in FM. (I have a green card).
Now my real anxiety begins. I am really worried about my responsibilities as an intern. I could not find any website explaining the daily routine of an intern. My questions are will I be left alone to treat a patient who comes in the ER in my first weeks? What will be expected of me? I am so confused there is no one else to guide me, no friends at all as I lost contact with everyone. I know most of you will think what a looser I am to this afraid at this point of time or I don’t deserve to get a residency spot as I am not as aggressive as some of the other doctors. But all I can say now is that I had to let it out, I had to give my fear words. Can anybody here help me out? Any family medicine residents out there to guide me, give me hope because all I can think now is that I will get fired because I don’t anything.





  #2

No one is a ready made resident.We'll all be afraid in intial days.I'd suggest you carry some thing like Oxford handbook of acute medicine or Oxford handbook of clinical medicine; I know they are more relevant to UK but they r really good books and I do not think medicine is significantly different in USA.

Remember "the golden rule- call for help if in doubt"

Do not worry you'll be well supported as it is ur attending's licence on the linesmiling face



Goodluck



  #3

My friend, I can understand what you are feeling, even if I am not going into FM, I think intern's life will be the same for all specialty, I am quite sure you will not be left alone, all programs know we are fresh, beginners and that we barely know anything about our new responsability so they will guide us until we are free to work alone. The speed at which we learn now depends on individual capacity and previous experience but I am sure you will be given the opportunity to make decisions and do our medical workup, once higher residents, fellows and faculties know we are good enough to be left alone, they will leave you to do stuff yourself. No surgeon is born operating, you learn everything in life, we learn by seeing and doing so dont be afraid my friend, you will just be fine. One of the best way to be good is having confidence in yourself, if you don't know something, just admit it, people that knows will tell you, dont be afraid to make mistakes but we should always try to learn something from every mistake we make in life. Hi, you will be fine. This is all I have to say... GL and congratulations for matching!!! You are going to be a good physician.


  #4

Oh yes i absolutely agree with bharathphoenix,

key words.

''CALL FOR HELP IF YOU DONOT KNOW''

It was estimated in UK that a doctor puts atleast 4 people at grave danger(or kills) before he learns from his/her mistakes and becomes a competent doctor!!!

and most of it is due to the fact that they hesitated to call for help when they didnt know.

remember ur never alone u have help at hand always use it,donot mind what people think but see that ur patient is not harmed at the end of the day.

u will do fine

GL



  #5

Thanks guys. No doubt this forum is the greatest friend anyone can have. I wouldnt say my fear is all gone but it hascertainly given me some hope. I am still looking for websites where i can read the daily routine and responsibilities of FM intern one of which is residentweb.com. Lets see what i can gather .Goodluck to all you friends.


  #6

ok residentweb.com is a collection of numerous sad stories that if anything will bring anyone's morals down. So i am not reading them anymore.


  #7

hey Still Anxious

your hospital will give you an orientation before the residency begins and there will definitely be someone watching over your shoulder in the initial few weeks...and believe me that's all it takes intially...a few weeks later you'll probably laugh at yourself for all the anxiety that you generated for yourself....

one more thing...never lie - if you did make a mistake admit it and move on...with the resolve to never ever repeat it again...and be honest towards your patients as well. these two things go a long way in establishing your dependability among your seniors...the very fact that you are willing to admit and acknowledge your fears has already won half the battle for you!!!

and remember, there are thousands of others setting out to sail the uncharted territories of residency along with you, mate! so you are not alone...

best of luck to all



  #8

first congrats on matching! as all the frends in the forum have given u valuable suggestions...n those r not just for u,guess all of us needed them as much.so believe in ureself n u will b surprised how much u remember from your medical knowledge.

apatrt from that i suggest u do an observership in your hosp b4 joining in july.it will give u headstart n u will not have much responsibility yet know the system and the staff.usually most hosp will let u do it for atleast 15 days.

we r all in the same boat n all r afraid of the yr ahead (even tho ive decided to totally enjoy untill julysmiling face so dont b afraid of challenges n it will just take a couple months for you to catch up.the best of doctors make mistake n know that its a continuous learning process.

best of luck!

drkill



  #9

I understand your fears because I'm anxious about the same thing, I even told the chairman at my program when I was interviewing and He told me that if I didn't have this anxiety it would have worried him. The worst thing would be to go in there with the same level of competency we have now but with an exaggerated sense of confidence, because that's when we'll get to cocky and make mistakes.






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