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SARDAR JOKES  / (This symbole of dance comes from Sardarji's Bhangara(folk dance of Punjab State of India)
1.Sardar is in a bar and his cellular phone rings.
He picks it up and says "Hello, how did you know I was here?"
2.Did you hear about the Sardar who signed all his cheques so that no one else could use them if he lost his cheque book?
3.Did you hear about the Sardar who asked his friends to give him all their burnt out light bulbs?
He just bought a camera and wanted to set up a Darkroom.
4.A Sardar was given the job of painting the white lines
down the middle of a highway.
On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles;
the following day less than a mile. Then the foreman asked the Sardar
why he kept painting less each day,
He replied "I just can't do any better. Each day I keep getting farther away from the paint can."
5.Why does a Sardar keep empty beer bottles in his fridge?
They're there for those who don't drink.
6.Why do Sardars have see-through lunch box lids?
So that when they're on the train they can tell if they're going to work or coming home.
7. Ms. Singh went to a swimming pool in a bra & panty.
The coach says: Ma'm, here a 2 piece costume is not allowed.
Ms Singh: So, which one shall I remove?
8. Three Construction workers are working on the 20th floor of a tall building in Bombay.
One is a South Indian, the second is a Bengali and the third is a Surd..
Every day all the three meet in the lunch hall and have their lunch together.
One fine day, the South Indian opened his lunch box and finds idlis in the box. He says "I am fed up of eating these idlis daily. If I find idlis in the box tommorow, I will jump from the 20th floor and die".
Next the Bengali opens his lunch box and finds fish in it and says "If I find fish in my lunch box tommorow, I am going to jump from the 20th floor of this building and die".
Next the Surd opens his lunch box and finds Parathas in it and says "If I find parathas in my box tommorow I am also going to jump and die".
The next day the three friends meet for lunch. The South Indian guy opens his lunch box and finds Idlis and promptly jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
The Bengali opens his lunch box and finds fish in it and jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
The Surd opens his box and finds parathas and he also jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
In the combined funeral held for all the three friends by their colleagues, the South Indian's widow says "I did not know he hated idlis so much.
If not I would have packed something else for his lunch".
The Bengali's widow says "I did not know he hated fish so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch".
The Surd's widow says "I do not understand what went wrong. My husband always prepared his own lunch!".
9. A Singh died and went to heaven.
When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that new rules were in effect due to the advances in education on earth. In order to gain admittance a prospective
heavenly soul must answer two questions:
1. Which days of the week begin with “ T ”
2. How many seconds are there in a year?
The Singh thought for a few minutes and answered...
1..The two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today and Tomorrow.
2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
Saint Peter said, "OK, I'll buy the Today and Tomorrow answer, even though it's not the answer I expected.
But how did you get 12 seconds in a year?"
The Singh replied, "Well, January 2nd, February 2nd,March , 2nd, etc..."
Saint Peter opens the gate without another word.
10. Three men were stranded on an uninhabited island. One was Hindu, one a Muslim, and the other a Singh. The only way back home was to swim 100 miles to the next island, which was inhabited.
The Muslim was so determined to get home that he tried to swim.
He made it 50 miles, got tired, and drowned.
Then the Hindu tried. He made it 75 miles, but got tired and he too drowned.
The Singh thought he could make it all the way, so he started swimming.
He swam 50 miles, but started getting tired, so he swam all the way back to the island.
11. Two Singh went into a pub and after ordering two beers took some sandwiches out of their pockets and started to eat them.
"You can't eat your own sandwiches in here," complained the pub-owner.
So the two sardars swapped their sandwiches.
12 . Banta Singh finished his English exam and came out. His friends asked him how did he do his exam, for that he replied
"Exam was okay, but for the past tense of THINK,
I thought, thought, thought
and at last I wrote THUNK!!!"
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