msyamp
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often fell no sense of loss
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| p53
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often believe they are somehow responsible for the death
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| msyamp
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i dont think so. are you sure?
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| achilles
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i'll go for 2 too-often feel responsible for the death.
a child at this age actually does not understand that death means that the person will never be with them again. they feel that if they behave in a good way and if they do all the things like the parent wanted then they will come back. so after juggling  between 1 and 2 i think i'll go for 2.
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| babli
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Ages 2 through 4. Preschoolers do not understand the permanence of death and may use their imagination to craft elaborate scenarios where their deceased loved one returns to life. They may also confuse death with sleep and, as a result, be fearful of going to bed or leaving your side. It’s best to clear up the confusion immediately by speaking to your child simply and calmly. You might say, “Grandma is dead. That means her body doesn’t work anymore and we won’t see her again. But we can keep her alive in our hearts by remembering all of the nice things she did for us.” These words may sound harsh at first, especially when spoken to a preschooler, so be sure to tell your children how much you love them and how you plan on being around for a long time.
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| p53
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by the way, Erik Erikson has named the period from 3 to 6 years as 'initiative vs. guilt'.
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| babli
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How children comprehend death and grieve depends largely on their age. For instance, a 4-year-old will likely not comprehend the finality of death and may even believe his deceased love one will return someday. An older child, however, will understand that death is irreversible and may endure various stages of grief—including guilt, apathy, anger and depression.
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| babli
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p53 it's by eric erickson but it doesn't say about child's perspective for death.
Stage 3: Initiative versus Guilt (3 - 6 years). Exploration continues to be important in this stage. In addition to the autonomy of Stage 2, children now become task oriented, planning and actively pursuing specific ends rather than just randomly exploring. Children express this partly through imitation of what adults around them do. Beyond flipping the pages of a magazine for the pleasure of seeing the pictures, a child at this stage may pretend to be reading the magazine. A new form of exploration is available to children in this stage -- expressive language. Children can ask adults questions and learn from the answers. When children are encouraged to explore and their questions are answered adequately, their initiative is fostered and they develop a sense of purpose in life. Children who are discouraged from exploring and whose questions are brushed aside may learn to feel guilty about intruding on adults. Similarly, a child whose plans and actions are ridiculed may feel guilty of being inadequate.
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| p53
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babli, the fact that 4-year-olds will likely not comprehend the finality of death and may even believe their deceased loved one will return someday doesn't mean that they 'often feel no sense of loss'.
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| babli
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p53 i think you are right.
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| msyamp
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hmm sounds intresting. Thanks for the discussion
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| srf
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often believe they are somehow responsible for the death is a correct answer.
it is indeed a initative vs guilt stage. child do not comprehend death properly. death of loved one is too much for him. as this is a stage of initative vs guilt, child will feel guilty
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