gimbugie
Forum Junior
Topics: 7
Posts: 60
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Dear Forum,
I have been a silent observer of this forum for some time now and finally registered today because I could use the help. Here's my story. I graduated 3 years ago from a foreign med school. I was born and raised here in the US but right after high school opted to go to school there. After 6 years of that came back home and started studying for the exams. Before I could do that my father passed away and it really set me back because he was my biggest my supporter. Still I got back to the books a few months later and started studying for Step 1 but things weren't easy. I had my mother to take care of and a brother who needed lots of help. I gave the exam thinking I would pass but I failed. I was a pretty good student throught my academic "career", sraight A's and worked hard in med school. That failing 68 just killed whatever drive I had left. I attempted to study for it agian even though it was hard to get back to the books and I went ahead and set up a date and ended being a no show. I left medicine for a while and met my now husband , got married and had a baby 3 months ago. Both men( We had a baby boy) have been a blessing in my life and my husband is so supportive of me pursuing this. I did study some through my pregnancy but had complications that put me in bed. Now after his birth I have once again opened the books. I just feel like I cry wolf and never carry through it even though I know this is what I want to do in life. All my peers have already started their residencies and have moved on while Im still stumped. In certain situations I have lied that I have passed the exams because I feel so embarassed. I know thats not an excuse to lie because that only puts me back further. My family and friends just cant understnd why I cant move on with this because I was always on top of my game.
You all are probably wondering what it is that I expect from this forum. I just need a little advise. Some one to tell me I can do it. People in similar situations or even not.
Thank you so much!
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| GMOB
Forum Elite
Topics: 22
Posts: 250
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Dear Gimbugie, I understand how you are feeling. This whole preparation process is not easy, much less when we are doing it alone and still trying to deal with everyday drama. I think the fact that you havent let go of your dream, and you keep coming back to your books, speaks volumes of you! Like you, i was an excelent student in med school, and i became overconfident taking the test, and when i saw that i didnt pass, i felt worst than a roach! It was double humulliation, first not passing S1 on the first try being an honor roll student, and second, it was a huge blow to my selfsteen; to the point that i'm still working on it. After taking the test, i took some time off, about 7-8 months, and then decided that i would give it another try (Actually, i've decided i'll give it as many tries as i require until i pass!) so i started studying little by little, finished book after book, i even went ahead and enrolled for the test, i want to take it before the year ends, but the truth is i have many things that i'm dealing with in life that are interfering with my studies, and i know we are supposed to be tough, and just concentrate on this, but many days i am just not focused. So, i just wanted you to know that you are not alone, and that this process will pass, it will not last forever, and if you really like medicine, then the rewards are so worth it! Please dont despair, start by setting small goals for everyday, like saying, today i will read one page, and actually do it, and then just increase your daily goals, and before you know it, you'll be on your way...It would be awesome if you could set an schedule, i know first hand it's tough with a baby, but please give it your best shot. Remember sometimes we have to sacrifice to achieve something we really want...Congratulations on your baby, and please do come to this forum often, i've learned a lot here, and i've found inspiration many days when i just want to send everything to hell and settle for whatever...If you want to continue to communicate, you can email me! We can give each other support! 
G.
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| gimbugie
Forum Junior
Topics: 7
Posts: 60
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Thank you G and drkps...It really does help to hear encouraging words. It was nice of you to take time to write back. I am picking up my books and like G said just going at it a day at a time. When the baby goes to sleep I pick up my books or when I take him out for a walk I just do Q book questions. I have to keep faith in God and myself. I think I had lost that for awhile. Also I would just think too much about it and not take it a day at a time, and that's what I need to do. Im going to continue to write here as it helps. Ive started with Behavioral Science so that I dont feel overburdened . Im giving myself 4 months to do this in. Please pray for me and yes G Id love to write to eachother. Do you have a baby as well?
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| gpsbrar
Forum Elite
Topics: 34
Posts: 278
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I think you must start with Kaplan Books. Watch the videos with the books. Then revise the books. Watch video again and revise the books once again with first aid book. Do the Qbank and read all the explanations carefully. Revise First Aid and add some notes to it. Revise it atleast twice. You are good for the test again. U CAN STUDY AS MUCH AS U WANT AND NEVER FINISH. COZ MEDICINE IS AN UNIVERSE. SO STUDY ONLY AS MUCH AS NEEDED FOR THE EXAM AND KAPLAN ALONE IS ENOUGH FOR USMLE IF FOLLOWED NICELY> I KNOW SOME PEOPLE WHO SCORED 96 ONLY BY KAPLAN'S HELP. I think this would help a little.
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| dr in trouble
Forum Guru
Topics: 62
Posts: 610
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Dera gimbugie, I am a foreign medical graduate having 3 kids, just did the exam1 week before. I dont know i will pass or fail but the main thing is that I appeared in the exam. u can imagine that how tough it was with 3 small kids( oldest one 4 years and youngest one 5 months), my husband didnt want me to go for usmle and bcoz it was only my decision so I suffered alone, do all house work, kids care, cooking, washing everything, the only support for me was my sister who just took my older children for 1-2 hours so I could study, you dont believe but it was the hardest time of my life, doing all it alone and couldn't complaint to anyone bcoz its my own decision, I had 6 sisters and brothers and we all r doctors and they all r practicing so thats the only reason to go for this exam so I can do something related to my profession, I am wondering that why u r not able to study with just having one 3 months old child, atleast u have supportive hubby .My advice ----x and read the whole course atleast twice and focussed on patho, physio and pharma. I think 60-70% paper is based on those subjects so try to command over them, and then do the rest of subjects.
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If u want to do something, do it today as there is no tomorrow.
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| drworm
Forum Senior
Topics: 11
Posts: 138
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I really am in awe of you dr in trouble and admire your courage and aspirations. I pray that you do really well and achieve your dream.
gimbugie keep at it and you will succeed. This forum is great on advise and you can get a whole lot of encouragement and support here. Good luck!
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| gimbugie
Forum Junior
Topics: 7
Posts: 60
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Gosh its been great reading all of this and it gives me so much strength to know Im not alone. Dr in trouble thank you so much. You will accomplish what you want because you believe in yourself . You are determined and strong. May God bless you.
GPSBRAR thanks also. I am studying from a mixture of books but Kaplan is the majority. I dont have access to videos...I guess you have to be enrolled in the programs center prep for that. I do plan on doing loads of questios though.
This forum has been a source of inspiration...just coming here everyday and reading everyones enteries gets me back on track. Thanks for the motivation!
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